Monday, June 23, 2008

Driving Forces...

Today, when I look back at my childhood, I realize the importance of those days. They always reside in the most softest corner of my heart. I don't think, I will ever be able to let that corner go open to any world. My bunch of memories might not be any different from any one of you reading this post, but I believe in the uniqueness of every moment. Every moment, in our life is special. They share different instances of the ever changing environment.
Read more, at the LJ post.

Friday, April 18, 2008

Child Manages...

Yesterday, I was commuting from Juhu to Kharghar, using the local trains of Mumbai. We don't have a direct train, and hence had to change multiple trains, on the way. I was trying to keep myself engaged by reading a book. At some station or so, a lady boarded the train, and was approaching near the seat, which was pre-occupied by me.

As she was nearing, the man next to me, got up, and offered his seat to the lady. I liked the man's gesture of offering his seat to the lady; it indeed is the helpful nature of the Mumbaikars, that I get to witness quite often. An interesting thing, is that, he did it quite calmly, without even bothering me, as I was engaged in reading the book.

Also, when I got to notice that she had a kid in our arms. For a moment, I felt like offering my seat to the man, who just got up, but the next moment, I felt like reading the book. I was so selfish that I kept my wishes before everything else. But, as I was reading the book, the kid started touching it, probably the kid liked it!

I got myself engaged with playing with the kid, and offering my book to him, to cherish some time. But, some time later, the kid started taking the book into his mouth, and that is where I had to steal the book from his eyes, and keep it appropriately in my bag. As soon as, I did this, the next moment, I was reminded that I should now be offering my seat to the man (who got up); as I was no longer reading the book. I repeated the man's gesture, back to him. Good things do come back to us; what we do, is what we get - this is what probably, has happened to that man.

I feel, this is what the lord wanted me to do. He/she found his/her own way out, to get things done by me. Probably, he/she wanted the man, and the lady to have the seats, and make me realize that I shouldn't get lost in anything, at any point of time, such that I even forget the environment. After all, it is the environment that tries to bridge multiple gaps between me, and society, I'm associated with.

And yeah, as I've heard from my elders - "Bachchein toh bhagwaan ka roop hotey hain!" (Children, are lords in disguise!) - is probably true, because, it was the child who played the entire role of getting things done. The child was a good manager for sure. :) Managed everything so quietly, and calmly, that no one even got a hint, of the things happening around.

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Remindings...

Yesterday, I had been to the Tata NCPA's Experimental Theatre for watching a play, but I shall not write about the play, in this post; shall keep it for some other post, some other day. Here, I would like to describe an incident which just happened. After watching the play, my friend and I, had been for the dinner, and then we moved to the Victoria Terminus, to catch our train back to Kharghar.

At the terminus, while my friend was taking the tickets, I stood besides him, merely to give him a company. He was in a queue. But, as we moved towards the ticket counter, there was an old man, who seemed to be poor, was in the queue too, and was at least four men ahead of us, in the queue. He couldn't take the tickets, as he wanted to goto Thane, and was not having enough money to buy himself a ticket. He was dressed in muddy white clothes, with a similar bag or so.

My friend had noticed him, but didn't react on it. And then, the man came towards me, and asked for some money. Initially, I resisted. I felt like, not to react on him. But, instantly, I was reminded of my Uncle's words; he had once said me, "Ankit, you need to trust people!". He had said me this, because, once we were together paying a visit to the Siddhi Vinayak Temple, and he had asked me to put some money into the 'Daan Kund' over there, and I had refused to do any such act. We had a discussion over the same act of mine, for half-an-hour or so, and he had then made this statement, after which, I was speechless!

So, as soon as I got reminded of his words, I took my wallet in my hands, gave my friend some money, and asked him to take a ticket to Thane too, such that the old man could easily reach his intended place. I feel, my uncle's words, somewhere or the other were true, else it wouldn't have pinched me today. I realize that my responsibility is of doing the task, and not to be much concerned about the consequences of the same. If I be, then too, it's good. At times, I prefer to be a dumb, and act as the way, people expect me to, because, after all, at the end of the day, everyone would seem to be happy, and that, isn't a heavy cost to pay.

Thursday, April 03, 2008

Mixed Bag...

The day, today, has been filled with a bag mixed of emotions. It brought various colours of life, before me. At times, it made me determined to do something useful, at times, it set me back. Variations, in today's day, wouldn't have been anything less than a sine wave, toggling between two states. I feel, am one of the fortunate guys, to having seen such variations in a short span of a day. A day's time isn't short, but if we compare it with the whole lifetime, I would say, it surely is short!

I started my day, with a lot of self-determination towards my life. I had my plans set before me, I knew exactly what I was going to do. And, trust me, things did go the way, god wanted me to do. I felt, I was just lucky enough to have a nice day, before me. But, this wasn't there to last for long. Some things didn't go as expected, some at the personal level, and some at the professional one too. When things weren't that good at the personal level, it didn't bother me much. I was at my ease, and calm; kept smiling.

But, when things didn't go good at the professional front (for the day) it is at that time, when I started feeling a bit disappointed, because these things had built on top of the personal front. I started getting a feel, as if, I was lost somewhere or the other.

Somewhere in the evening, I happened to call up a friend of mine, Ms. R (she prefers to keep her name anonymous in this post). I've never spoken about her anytime at this blog of my mine. She, and I, had been together in our school, atleast till 8th Standard. It was at that time, when she had a change in her schooling. We came together after a long time, thanks to the social networking thingy on the web. I had called her up, for nothing specific, but to have a general talk on the recent happenings in life. Along the talk, she happened to get engaged in some work, at her home, and the talk was left, as is, then and there.

After that, feeling a bit lonely, I started pinging a couple of friends of mine, called up some too, but none seemed to be available at the moment. Am not complaining for them, it just wasn't my day, till then, remember! Anyways, when I was moving from my place to the restaurant, to have my dinner, I happened to receive an unexpected call, and guess what? T'was from R.

She called up back, because, she felt that I was a bit upset, for the day. I was wondering, what made her feel that, but as other friends of mine used to say, "It's not easy for Ankit, to hide what he feels!". Anyways, I probably feel that I don't have words to desrcibe what she made me feel, through out our talk, and even now. It is she, who brought back to me, the words that I used to say, to my friends, when they would feel low. The kind of cozyness, and calmness, that she brought, to me, during the talk, is worth appreciable. Brought back the comfort feeling to me. No doubt, that she likes to make people smile. I appreciate, this attitude.

It does make me feel glad to have friends besides me (not physically though! Distances don't matter, as long as relationships are close), the ones, whom I can count upon, especially at the times, when I feel low. As someone had rightly said, friends are like jewels, who'll always shine before you, especially, when you need them to shine, for you. But, I feel, they're much more than jewels. Touch wood, or stone.

Sunday, March 16, 2008

What am I, to her?

I've never tried to put up any post here on Blogger in regard to my interests in poetry, and some thoughts which emanated from within. But today, I shall be putting a cross-reference to a post which I've put up at my LJ.

A couple of lines can be located here.

Saturday, January 19, 2008

The sides...

A friend of mine used to say me quite frequently that if you can't see the brighter side of life, then try polishing the dull side. This statement was pretty strange to me, as I couldn't possibly judge which side was brighter and which duller. It possibly happens with most of us, and at many times. We find ourselves so clinched with some problem or the other that we start getting a feel that we're the only ones who face all these problems.

We probably see, or sometimes even ignore the other side of the coin. We are at times immersed within our own cubes that looking towards the sunshine at the other end is way beyond our reach. Some lips even speak about the out-of-the-box-thinking thing. Endowment of knowledge or the skill to solve problems might have been there, but ignorance of the same might deprive us, of what we have.

That's exactly where optimism brings multiple spaces for everyone. It brings with itself multiple rays of hope, and with hope, comes the will to strive for things, which probably might be beyond our reach. An attribute, so simple and so elegant, tries to polish the dull side, with it's own beauty.

And as some one had said, positive pictures come out from the negatives developed in a darkroom. So, if you find yourself lonely and in dark, understand that, life is working on a beautiful picture for you.
Bucket-Fillers...

I thank my friend Veer for sharing this forward with me.

You have heard of the cup that overflowed. This is a story of a bucket that is like the cup, only larger, it is an invisible bucket. Everyone has one. It determines how we feel about ourselves, about others, and how we get along with them. Have you ever experienced a series of very favorable things which made you want to be good to people for a week? At that time, your bucket was full.

A bucket can be filled by a lot of things that happen. When a person speaks to you, recognizing you as a human being, your bucket is filled a little. Even more if he calls you by name, especially if it is the name you like to be called. If he compliments you on your dress or on a job well done, the level in your bucket goes up still higher. There must be a million ways to raise the level in another's bucket. Writing a friendly letter, remembering something that is special to him/her, knowing the names of his/her children, expressing sympathy for his/her loss, giving him/her a hand when his/her work is heavy, taking time for conversation, or, perhaps more important, listening to him/her.

When one's bucket is full of this emotional support, one can express warmth and friendliness to people. But, remember, this is a theory about a bucket and a dipper. Other people have dippers and they can get their dippers in your bucket. This, too, can be done in a million ways.

Let's say I am at a dinner and inadvertently upset a glass of thick, sticky chocolate milk that spills over the table cloth, on a lady's skirt, down onto the carpet. I am embarrassed. "Bright Eyes" across the table says, "You upset that glass of chocolate milk." I made a mistake, I know I did, and then he told me about it! He got his dipper in my bucket! Think of the times a person makes a mistake, feels terrible about it, only to have someone tell him about the known mistake ("Red pencil" mentality!)

Buckets are filled and buckets are emptied? Emptied many times because we don't really think about what we are doing. When a person's bucket is emptied, he/she is very different than when it is full. You say to a person whose bucket is empty, "That is a pretty tie you have," and he may reply in a very irritated, defensive manner.

Although there is a limit to such an analogy, there are people who seem to have holes in their buckets. When a person has a hole in his bucket, he/she irritates lots of people by trying to get his/her dipper in their buckets. This is when he/she really needs somebody to pour it in his/her bucket because he/she keeps losing.

The story of our lives is the interplay of the bucket and the dipper. Everyone has both. The unyielding secret of the bucket and the dipper is that when you fill another's bucket it does not take anything out of your own bucket. The level in our own bucket gets higher when we fill another's, and, on the other hand, when we dip into another's bucket we do not fill our own ... we lose a little.

Therefore, let us put aside our dipper and resolve to touch someone's life in order to fill their bucket.
Small things...

I've listened to many people saying me, preaching me, and even convincing me that our Life is too big, and every now and then, there are many small things that happen and don't really matter, in our endless journey of life. But, I've always felt that there is some relation between these smaller things that add value to our lives.

I wanted to blog some events, expressions that were happening with me, and my life, but then, I thought why to blog it down, as they happen? So, I preferred to stay calm for sometime, and then sit down some day, and try to see whether those events, and expressions really mattered (or still matter) to me, in my journey or were they really small!?

I'm reminded of an incident that happened sometime back in November last year. I'll try to pen it down! I had to go to Kanjurmarg from Kharghar, to meet a couple of friends of mine. I started from Kharghar via a bus, and got down at Sion Station (a crowded area) such that I could catch hold of a train to Kanjurmarg. It was sometime in the evening around 6:30 PM or so.

Before the entrance of the Sion Station, there is a footpath nearby, which is covered by yellow colored iron fence (sort of a thing), such that the traffic on the road goes on smoothly, and the pedestrians could move along the footpath without much problems. So, when I had to enter the station, I had to move around the fence and then keep my feet over the footpath.

At the juncture, from where I could enter, there was a small puppy who was eating a few biscuits, that were lying before him, in the center of the footpath. As soon as I got to notice the puppy, I kept my leg away from the biscuits, such that the puppy could have them easily, and fulfill his hunger. Just after that, a girl turned up, and took those biscuits in her hand, and kept them in the corner of the footpath. It all happened within a matter of a few seconds.

It was a very small thing that she had done. She had noticed the puppy eating the biscuits, and acted in a proactive manner, and kept them apart because she might have felt that someone else might stamp either the puppy or the biscuits, in such a crowd. I felt, that there indeed is humanity on this planet. That girl's move made my day.

I was then a bit more convinced that small things do matter, in our lives. And moreover, if I look at the whole incident that had happened, it wasn't really that big, that I should have been able to remember it, even till date. I now firmly believe that these small things are part and parcels of our life. They come to us bringing with them lots of things - some bring the feel of happiness, some bring the aggression, some bring the pleasant moments, some break out the rebel, and some even bring the sense of responsibility that this girl had brought before me.

Probably, tagging the event as small, might be a 'wrong' thing, but rationality is relative, and it wouldn't matter even if I tag it as big. These are those cups of coffee, that bring love to the ones having it. After all, every drop of water - be it from any source - adds up to the ocean. Events, expressions; no matter how big or small they are, they do bring some charm to our journey of Life.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Gaming With Time ...

This is something which happened to me, a couple of days back, while I was commuting my way back to home via the BEST bus. I got hold of the bus at the stop from where I usually get into it - the Vashi Bus Depot. Well, I can catch the bus at the Vashi Plaza Bus Stop as well, but then in want for a seat, I walk up to the depot.

That day, I was very tired, and I didn't get the seat, nothing to worry about, and so, I was commuting standing within the bus. Soon after sometime, wherever I was standing, the bus conductor asked me to inform a small boy seated three seats ahead of me, to keep his hands within the window of the bus. I did it and so did the boy, take his hands in.

And after a few seconds, I got a seat. Still nothing special. After a few stops from that current location, a couple - senior citizens, in fact, got into the bus, and as they approached my seat to stand besides it, I noticed them. I could offer my seat, and so did I. The old female sat onto the seat, I was seated on. And I was standing again. After sometime, yet another seat besides where I was standing got vacated, and I was able to catch hold of it. And so, I sat again.

But the older male was still standing, and this was the time when there was heavy traffic amongst the neurons within my brain, and might have ended up in numerous collisions, as well. This traffic was very fast, and turbulent enough while deciding whether I should give this seat as well, to the other half of the couple to sit and get in the comfort zone, or should I not think about him, and be seated and relish my seat. Believe me, I was thinking about the very thing, for about three to four minutes, or so.

And then, when the bus was moving along it's way, the old male wasn't able to balance himself standing alongside, and was wandering towards swinging his pale body, as the pendulum would do along the clock. I had no more thoughts then, and offered the seat to the other half. And also, by the time the older male would reach up to my seat, there was a young gentleman standing besides, who immediately jumped in, in want for the same seat. I had to stop him and inform that I was volunteering my seat to the older male.

So, I was left standing again. After a few minutes, I got yet another seat. And I was then wondering as to what an instance it's been, since, just a few minutes back, to the then present tick of the hour. As soon as, I got myself comfortably seated, it reminded me of what I had concluded earlier, at this post. And so, I spent that evening having seated on three different seats of the same bus within a span of say 30 minutes or so.

It's really good to see things happening good, when you do good, and you desperately want it, and you get it. I know the fact that it's not the case with everyone, but then I feel everyone gets what one desires only at the appropriate time, and not before it, and not after it. It's all about what-we-do, which results in what-we-get.

This is some game being played by time as our dominating opponent, and we should not be fighting against it to win, as because there can not be any result to the game. It's just about how close we are towards our win, and so, we need to do the 'good' things, to get the 'good' thing. Defining what's good is solely within our hands.

There are numerous times when we play our game with time, and every time, it's merely our compounded possibility, towards the win, that shall keep us going.